Ije Inwe Onwe Gi - The Journey of Being Free

Freedom is something that we sometimes crave, unfortunately not many people know how to manage their new found freedom. “May we think of freedom not as the right to do as we please, but as the opportunity to do what is right.” - Peter Marshall

This quote from Peter Marshall is just so apt.

The thought of being free and independent always seems so exciting until it is thrust on us and then we realize that we were not truly prepared. Today my country Nigeria celebrates 60 years of being Independent, free from our colonial masters. So yeah, we are an independent nation, but are we truly free?

Remember the first time you left home to varsity. That breath of fresh air that was replaced by the inability to manage your time and scarce resources. Mom is no longer there to manage your meals and so you find yourself eating noodles and bread for an entire month. Many times we make a mess of this freedom - either swinging from the extreme of being at every party or the other extreme of being at every church vigil and event.

I think it's more difficult now with our kids who hardly get the opportunity to go to boarding house. When I say boarding house I do not mean the sophisticated hostels many private high schools offer these days oo, where there are janitors to clean up after the children, they have access to watch TV and more. Haa..... If you did not attend a Unity boarding school in Nigeria your journey is far oh. Haa haa haa. We learned to clean, cook, make our beds, manage our resources and we made friends that have lasted a lifetime.

How did I digress so much. Hmm....

Children of today still find themselves needing a guardian even when they are off to varsity because they have spent all of their growing up years in the comfort and protection of mom and dad and so when they get their first taste of freedom it is usually not managed well at all. It is so important for us to teach our children the necessary survival skills they need for the larger world. You cannot afford for anyone to take advantage of them.

By the way, age is not a guarantee that the skill of being independent has been learned. Look at my country Nigeria @ 60. Ok, let me not even shake that particular table. I remain ever loyal to my country. Sadly though, the behavior we see at the national level is a build up of what exists in the smallest unit - being the family.

On the flip side, some of us as parents thrust too much responsibility on our children at such a tender age. This is so wrong because many times these children try to relieve their lost childhood when they become adults. When they get to that point where they should embrace the responsibility that adulting brings they just want to be children and play. There is no vacuum in life, if you steal anyone's childhood, they will surely look for a way to get that childhood back. So yes, as much as we try to teach our children to be street-wise and ready to cope when they leave home, there must be that balance that allows them to be children at the right age.

I always love to defer to the Bible, wow, the Bible is such a complete book You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you (1 Corinthians 6: 12a). This is the power of responsibility - being able to walk away from things which you have the authority to do but you know is not good for you. True freedom is about choosing what you do or not do when you report only to yourself and God of course.

So are you truly free, or are you still a slave to societal pressure, self esteem, what others think?

Some of us wear certain clothes and shoes because they're in vogue, however uncomfortable they may be. Sometimes we play certain music because they're trending, not that we particularly like them. Many girls have their first sexual experiment because all their friends have experimented too and they do not want to be left out of the conversations. And the young men, they start to drink and smoke just so they are not looked down on when the 'happening boys' are being mentioned. Let us even leave the young one. Mama and Papa Nothing-Spoil that must go on summer vacation to the Americas or Europe even when you cannot afford it, trying to keep up with the Joneses - try local tourism once in a while and stop getting into debt with your travel agent.

To be truly free, you have to be your own person, own your own decisions, be confident in yourself and be proud of your own decisions. As my people would say "This life na one chance oh" meaning you have only one opportunity to live, I mean truly live. Imagine living this single opportunity called your life in another's shadow and never truly being free. Now that's sad.

Liberate yourself friends. Step out of that person's (or society's) shadow. Enjoy the liberty that you have in Christ. Be you, do you, live you.

And yeah...... Happy 60th Independence Day Nigeria!!! May we someday be truly free to be the great nation we have been called to be under God.

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Ije.....Journey

Photo by Amanda Jones on Unsplash